It’s your job to look after yourself; expectations ruin relationships

Melissa Ambrossini introduced me to the idea of ‘expectations ruin relationships’. To me, it really solidifies the need to look after yourself, and to take ownership of building yourself up. It’s too big of a job to rely solely on someone else or other people to do it for you.

The less is more approach: how to be more by doing less, it’s all about values!

 

I don’t think anyone would disagree with me when I say that people remember others by the way they made them feel, not by the words they chose to use. This quote has been around for aaaaages… and there is real truth behind it!

I’m here to tell you that the best way to make an impact on people, for better or worse (let’s hope for the latter), is to think about the place you are coming from when you chose your words. This, my friend, is the secret to doing less…

There are two sides to every coin: how embracing both sides of life can help relationships and being an influential role model

Food for thought… do you think we can know what happiness is or really appreciate it without experiencing times of being sad?

I recently listened to a podcast that featured Dr John Di Martini. He is a really interesting man and I suggest you google him if you haven’t already. In this podcast, he spoke about how there are always two sides to every coin. It really got me thinking, and for the life of me I can’t think of anything without an opposite…

3 ways to show compassion: how compassion can get you all the attention you need and help you with difficult conversations

Healthy relationships are central to our happiness. Full stop. It’s a basic human psychological need to have positive relationships in our lives to feel like we belong and have feelings of worthiness. In a sense, we all want the same things, because it’s in our DNA. Whether we like it or not, we all strive for love and connection with each other. So it only makes sense to have some strategies up our sleeves for when our relationships aren’t smooth sailing, and when we want more attention and productivity from the people around us. The secret is compassion, my friend.

What’s in a name: labels that we give ourselves matter

I recently read an article in the newspaper about homelessness. What really caught my attention about it was the research outlined in the article about how labels significantly impact people’s wellbeing.

In a nut shell, people without a stable home commonly take on the label as being homeless, but not always. A lot of people who have no place to live claim they are not ‘homeless’ because their situation may be complicated. What was interesting but somewhat no surprise, was that those who described themselves as homeless had significantly lower self-esteem and wellbeing compared to those who rejected the label, even when having no place to live.

When it comes to mental health, when we use a label to describe ourselves, we begin to think and act in ways that are associated with that label.

‘Love’ is a verb: love is more than just a feeling, it’s an action.

Love is the most important word in the English speaking language. We have made billions of movies about it and even more music. Psychologists recognise it as an emotional human need. But I think what makes love so complex is that it’s not only a feeling, but a choice we make. Love is a verb or a ‘doing’ word.

First impressions should never last

A lot of people write about using first impressions and using them as a marketing strategy. For example, how to make a good first impression for job interviews, meeting new people, engaging people in your website from a quick glance or other business purposes. While I think this is a fantastic way to make use of this amazing innate human ability, it’s helpful to know that first impressions aren’t always helpful when they last.

Lads vs Ladies – why are we so different?

Did you know that for a man to realise a woman is interested in him, she has to flirt seven times before he will notice?

A social study observed both men and women in a social setting. At first, it was a room full of fifteen women. Later in the experiment, fifteen men entered the room. It’s so interesting to see how the women instantly changed their behavior. The girls started flicking their hair and talking louder… I wonder why?

What’s your love language?

The way that I feel loved is completely different to the way that my twin sister feels loved. Even though we are quite similar and speak many languages of our own, we actually speak a completely different love languages.

I feel loved and cared for when people hug me, put their arm around me or even put their hand on my shoulder. Jane, my twin sister, is not a physical touch person and does not like me trying to hug her… sad face.